Meet Kaira

Awakening

Growing up the daughter of a pastor serving rural parishes during the ’50s and ’60s, there was little room for big questions. Life was defined by faith, faith was defined by doctrine, and ours was certainly the “right” one. I attended a church-affiliated college, but although that would not and of course could not ensure that such certainty would not be challenged, what really happened was that the lures offered by my newfound freedom simply induced me to ignore the whole business of religion and faith.

I continued the assiduous neglect of all things spiritual after college, while I dedicated ample energy to pursuit of the unspiritual projects of unleashed youth. It seems that I was a quick learner, for by midway through my 20s I had burned my way through to the other side of the world’s enticements, emerging disappointed, disillusioned and, honestly, just plain tired.

Beginning

With a mixture of resistance and relief, I returned to the last place that, long ago, things had seemed to make sense – the church. But it was far from a simple return; it was a return with teeth. I had seen the world and it had not complied with the clearly defined and unchallenged views I had been taught. I returned to the church with a desire to engage substantively with matters of faith as they collided with the world of dynamic change and challenge through which I had stumbled. When I found the familiar formulae of the Christian tradition insufficient for my questions, I looked to formal theological study to find the answers I sought, and enrolled in a Master of Divinity degree program. I had convinced myself that I had a vocation for ordained ministry, but in hindsight, it is clear that I simply wanted to know. I needed to know.

Questioning

Before the first semester grades were in, the doors to a new world had been flung open, as I discovered three things: first, that the faith journey is defined more by finding the right questions than by finding the right answers; second, that the disciplines of theology offered the tools to discover and penetrate those questions; and third, that I wanted to spend my life exploring the intersections of finite and infinite things, with all the freedom and diligence that the task demanded. Ultimately, that my hopes to follow this passion into a doctoral program were waylaid by life events proved providential, for I was launched on a lifelong search that took me to landscapes that an academic career would never have crossed. I was on my way, and I was on my own.

Even in those first years after completing my degree, as I still hoped to make my way back to advanced academic studies, it became clear to me that my hunger for spiritual understanding was expansive. It was then, beginning in my mid-30s, that my vocation of theological scholarship joined with spiritual practice became clear. That clarity was accompanied by a transformed sense of self that resulted in the discernment to rename that self, and it has shaped the years of my journey: Kaira from the Greek kairos, indicating the fullness of each moment in which I sought to live, Adam from the Hebrew adamah, representing the earth, the humus from which each incarnation of God arises and which joins me to all of creation. It is a daily reminder of my aim for living in this world day to day, moment to moment, in reverence for my life and the search that defines it.

Exploring

Over decades, that search has taken me in and out of Christian churches of various confessions, and has included the major world religions, indigenous expressions, and modern spiritual movements, to consider their beliefs, practices and impacts. It has welcomed the insights of the sciences and of great literature. The ancient practice of Christian contemplative prayer, rediscovered and retooled for our time in the last few decades, led to an encounter with monastic life and its embodiment of the single-minded pursuit of God, and prompted me once again to drop everything, at age 45, to work toward a Master’s degree in Monastic Studies. While my earlier theology studies had given me the drive and the tools to think creatively of things both divine and human, the immersion in monastic spirituality instilled the rhythm of prayer and the pervasive orientation toward the sacred that grounds not only my ongoing study, but the very hours of my days. And on an extended retreat at a Trappist monastery 25 years ago, a profound mystical experience blew wide the doors of my mind and heart and impelled me to trust the path of direct knowledge of God which is each human person’s birthright. My way has been wide, and deep, and full.

Listening

On that way, I have come to know so many people who are seeking a way to live that honors what they feel to be true: that there is an ultimate Ground of Reality to experience, to embrace, and to emulate. Some have walked away from a church that no longer speaks to them, while some have never had a religious foundation to reject; others sit in a church pew each Sunday, struggling to suppress discomfort with the outdated cosmology implicit in the words they hear and say. Some consider themselves “spiritual but not religious,” but feel the lack of an essential rootedness; some have adopted alternative religious or spiritual traditions but have lacked the guidance to plumb their depths. Many are not satisfied with the offerings of contemporary spiritual movements, but are wary of any way that carries the scent of institution. And some – yes, some – are steadfast in faith but know, just know, that there is more territory than they have thus far been encouraged to explore.

So many today are hungry for a spiritual path that can hold what has been learned of the world throughout history in the sciences, literature and the arts; who possess an independent spirit, a willingness to enter dynamically into the messiness of life in order to unearth a new apprehension of our Ultimate Source and to participate with it to engender new visions, to imagine new futures, and to bring them into being; who want to think deeply and to integrate proven spiritual practices so to build a personal path into an authentic journey within the Ground of All Being, a path of integrity, rigor and creativity.

Creating

It is these people who have framed my search to discover the means to break open the constraints of historic doctrine while retaining its ability to shape reflection, to invite new and challenging voices into the conversation, and to translate the essential concepts into language accessible to anyone willing to give themselves over to the task. It is for these people I write; it is to them that I speak.

And now is the time for this book, The Grand Adventure: Bearing the Imago. The need for a quickening vision has never been greater, as voices around us offer little to counter the slide toward resignation to an increasingly dismal status quo. As necessary as a renewing vision are the reconception of the means for change, and the restoration of hope and confidence for the individual and community as they move into the future that a holy imagination fashions.

In the ripe years of my study, the wisdom of a few resonant and complementary figures has coalesced into an architecture of hope. What I offer is the consummation of a lifetime of independent scholarship suffused with a commitment to spiritual practice, and informed by the daily challenges we all face. I offer it as one vehicle for the embrace and engagement of the shared human and divine task of building a world of peace, compassion, and hope. What I offer is an invitation into the Grand Adventure of life in God.

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